“When I left the hospital a week later, I reflected on the 6 months of my personal hell that led me to that fateful night. I said this, about that whole experience, as we left the parking lot: ‘No one could have helped me. No one knew what to do. But I know now. And I know that I can help people out of this. I know the way.’

There is zero doubt in my mind that I was saved. It’s inarguable. I didn’t ask for it. I didn’t want it at the time. But the epiphany I had when I left the hospital is the same way I feel now, 22 years later. 

I know the way out. 
I've envisioned myself as carrying a torch that never burns out, and I’m in the twists and turns of dark caverns lighting the way through. In the past, it was just me down there, trying to make sense of things, trying to understand my own darkness, trying to save myself, knowing there was so much more than what I could see at the time, knowing that there was a far more powerful light somewhere that I had to find. 
 
I found it. 
Now I see myself as back in those caverns, and they’re familiar, but they’re not exactly mine. They’re yours. They’re part of me, I believe, because we’re all connected, all one. But they’re yours in that they’re for you to navigate. They’re for you to find the light in. So I walk with you with my torch that never goes out. I don’t have your answers, but I’ve traversed similar land. I’m more of a guide, a facilitator, letting you know you’ll find your way out. And you will, you do.
 
I’m here for a reason, just like you.”