Category: Depression

The Truth about Why I'm Here (for you)

7/15/2019

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

“What brought you to this medicine?”

Patients ask me this. I give my usual answer of “I wasn’t well; nothing else was helping me, and I finally decided to try it.”

That’s not it, though. There is the truth, the backstory you likely wouldn’t believe.
...

There is no reason I should be alive right now.
I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

I was at a funeral a couple of weeks ago. My aunt said to me, “I get your newsletter. I share it with my friend. Her daughter is really struggling with depression and anxiety. I wish she could come see you. I tell them that you really get it, that if anyone does, it’s you.”

It hit me. You’re right; I really, really get it. There are big parts of my “story” that I don’t share but that are the actual driving force behind why I’m in this field, why I’ve chosen (more like have been called) to do what I do. (It all comes full circle.)

I’ve been compelled to write my story recently. Here’s a snippet that might speak to you. It’s about the most pivotal (aka worst) time in my life at the young age of 13. It was the light shining through after the storm, an epiphany, when I realized that I was here (and more importantly knew how) to help people free themselves from their suffering, despair and emotional chaos.

...

“When I left the hospital a week later, I reflected on the 6 months of my personal hell that led me to that fateful night. I said this, about that whole experience, as we left the parking lot: ‘No one could have helped me. No one knew what to do. But I know now. And I know that I can help people out of this. I know the way.’

There is zero doubt in my mind that I was saved. It’s inarguable. I didn’t ask for it. I didn’t want it at the time. But the epiphany I had when I left the hospital is the same way I feel now, 22 years later.

I know the way out.
I've envisioned myself as carrying a torch that never burns out, and I’m in the twists and turns of dark caverns lighting the way through. In the past, it was just me down there, trying to make sense of things, trying to understand my own darkness, trying to save myself, knowing there was so much more than what I could see at the time, knowing that there was a far more powerful light somewhere that I had to find.

I found it.
Now I see myself as back in those caverns, and they’re familiar, but they’re not exactly mine. They’re yours. They’re part of me, I believe, because we’re all connected, all one. But they’re yours in that they’re for you to navigate. They’re for you to find the light in. So I walk with you with my torch that never goes out. I don’t have your answers, but I’ve traversed similar land. I’m more of a guide, a facilitator, letting you know you’ll find your way out. And you will, you do.

I’m here for a reason, just like you.”

about cailin

learn about Cailin's treatment of Anxiety, Depression, Grief + Past Trauma

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How to Climb Out of Depression

3/25/2019

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by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

It hits you. You don’t know how long it’s been developing.

You’ve been sinking, emotionally, and you’re less and less able to surface.

You feel a heaviness, like you’re living in a fog.

You keep crying or you can’t seem to cry at all.

No amount of talking about it makes you feel better.

You don’t know what to do, and maybe you can’t even find the energy to try.

It’s oppressive. It’s overwhelming. It haunts you. You can’t shake it.

The thoughts swarm, and they’re all defeating you; they’re negative; a barrage of “what’s the point?” or “I can’t take this anymore” or “no one understands.”

Depression doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you.
It doesn’t mean you’re any less worthy or capable than anyone else.
It’s not necessarily a disease plaguing your brain, either.

YOU ARE HAVING FEELINGS. YOU ARE REACTING TO LIFE.
STEP ONE: ACCEPT THAT.

Whew. Now that the truth has been dropped, let’s keep going…

There is this stigma against being sad, angry or in despair. It’s as if it’s not ok to feel awful. That’s the first problem. Judging these valid emotions as wrong or bad is the starting point to a downward spiral.

Here’s the thing. You’re entitled to feel HOWEVER you feel. Don’t shame yourself. And don’t take it personally if other people shame you, either. They’re just doing the best they can from their frame of mind. And people can be judge-y as F, you know.
It's ok.
Forgive them, keep going.

Depression gets tricky. It’s very convincing, not to mention dreadfully heavy. It pulls you down. It changes how you see everything. The negative thoughts go on and on, one cascade after another, feeding off of each other, until you feel so awful, so wholly inconsolable, that you feel utterly lost.

How can you climb out of this?

First of all, YOU CAN. I promise you that. I have. You can. You may have to more than once, and that’s ok. Keep going. We are SUCH a resilient species! We have no concept of the massive power we possess. Even if you tap into 5% of that power, it’s enough to get you out of the darkness. How? Because each move you make, each negative thought you challenge, each step you take toward feeling better gets you closer and closer to the relief and true peace you seek.

I can only share with you what has helped me and my patients. But remember, we are all different. We all need an approach that fits us uniquely. SO, start by feeling for what it is that YOU need. There are so many people out here, including me, waiting for you to show up seeking help. But you have come find us.

When I was 13, I was in a downward spiral no one could stop. Really. Thankfully, when it was just about too late, I found the help I needed (let's call it divine intervention), and it woke me up to that 5% of my power. I never felt that low again. I saved myself, and it was just the beginning of my journey to feeling whole and happy. I can report to you that decades later, I continue to discover greater happiness and wholeness.

No one will advocate for you like you can. No one knows what you need. Only you do. Somewhere inside, you intuitively know what you need. You HAVE to follow that. Sometimes it means you need to make a HUGE change, like move to a new state, get a new job, leave a relationship, travel. Sometimes it means you make a lot of little changes until your life totally transforms, like taking up meditation, weekly therapy sessions, joining a group, etc. Maybe you need to do both of those things.

You must change that negative spiral frame of mind that seeps in like poison, though. The best way to do that is to GET a different perspective. Literally. GO get it. The best way to do that is to ASK for it. Meditation can help you find it. Prayer can. Going for a drive can. Reading a book on the topic can (books have changed my life, my health and my mind for the better pretty epically). The way you are currently seeing things is just ONE way. You can see them differently.

As the brilliant late Dr. Wayne Dyer said:
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

So, climb out of the hole. Look for any glimmer of light and follow it. You may feel like a speck in this world, but we are ALL connected, we are ALL powerful, and we ALL have INCREDIBLE gifts to offer one another. We need yours.

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...
other articles you may like...

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Cupping as an Exorcism

5/27/2018

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Releasing Held Traumas

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

Spooky title, huh? Don't freak out and cancel your next appointment. :)
You’re going to be surprised how obvious this is after I explain.

TRUTH:
Some of the darkest, most intense cup marks I have seen were not on patients with pain but patients with significant past emotional trauma.

According to Chinese medicine, this makes perfect sense.
But you may wonder how emotions are related to your body.
Allow me to explain.
...

Emotional Imprints

STEP ONE:
Something happens to you that is jolting, shocking, upsetting, painful, etc.
(physically or emotionally)

STEP TWO:
It then creates an imprint in your physiology… a true shock to the system, if you will.

STEP THREE:
Your systems become blocked, impaired, sluggish.
(We refer to this as “stagnation” in Chinese medicine.)

STEP FOUR:
If nothing is done to move this stagnation, it continues to accumulate.

STEP FIVE:
You experience worsening physical and emotional symptoms.

STEP SIX:
You’re fed up and ready for legit healing.

STEP SEVEN:
You come to see me, and we opt for cupping.

STEP EIGHT:
I use a gentle, sliding method and we analyze the color and severity of the markings.
(the marks are not painful, FYI)

STEP NINE:
In a few days, you report feeling “brand new,” like a weight has been lifted off of you.

So, what does cupping do?
It moves stagnation.
...

Past Hurt, Be Gone!

Cupping pulls up the gunk just hanging out and accumulating in your system so that your body can clear it out. You might feel crummy after the treatment because your body is working to detoxify the gunk. But in a few days, it’s gone.

You’re no longer carrying those remnants of whatever was causing the stagnation.

Whatever has happened to you emotionally may be significantly impacting your physical health. It may show up as physical pain, fatigue, digestive issues, headaches, PMS… you name it. We carry past pain with us, often unknowingly, and it colors our health, relationships, decisions and the way we see the world. Sometimes you don’t have to psychoanalyze your past trauma to death… you just have allow yourself to let it go.
...

TRUTH:
An exorcism simply implies that we’re calling something up and out of your being that doesn’t serve you. Be gone, stagnant energy, past hurts and aching pain!

Chinese medicine is fan-freaking-tastic for alleviating emotional trauma, stress, anxiety and depression. And I happen to specialize in those things. I understand it personally and professionally, and I also know how to overcome it.

So, if you want to try something new, something profoundly effective and surprisingly gentle, you know where to find me.

-Cailin

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Entering Your Winter

11/27/2017

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Embracing the Dark

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

We all have seasons of our lives. We all experience ups and downs.

In the practice and scope of Chinese medicine, winter is the time of utmost yin. What is yin? Yin is darkness, consolidation, stillness. In winter, we descend into darkness, literally. The nights grow longer and there is less light. The temperatures drop. When it’s cold and dark, we naturally slow down. Our bodies want to rest. We crave rich foods to help us stay nourished and warm. This is the natural order of things.

...

What does it mean to be in your winter?

Our winters are the periods of our lives when we feel the need to pull away, turn inward, retreat and stay quiet. It could be a time of grief or sadness. It could be a period of reflection and a need to collect ourselves. Regardless, it’s a very natural process of being human. We have seasons in our lives. They can last hours or days, months or even years. Sometimes we are on an upswing; sometimes we’re at a low point.

It’s normal to experience ups and downs, highs and lows. Our resistance to the changing tides of our lives or feelings can create more problems for us and keep us stuck in the dark.

...

How to Embrace Your Winter

It’s easy to embrace feeling happy and excited. It can be incredibly difficult to embrace what doesn’t feel good… fatigue or illness, shock or grief, anxiety or loneliness, loss or heartbreak. These are our winters. These experiences ask us to look within, to slow down, to sit with ourselves, to retreat. Most of all, they are times when we need ourselves most. We need our own support. We need to be on our team and nurture ourselves through the darker times we face. After our winters, we have the potential to be reborn. We can reemerge with new insight, compassion and self-love. We can feel renewed in a way that only our dark times could have provided. Consider that upswing as your personal shift from winter to spring.

...

When You Willingly Enter the Dark

How can you abide and sit with yourself through your winter? How can you willingly enter the dark?

1) Know that it’s just you that you will find

The darkness is a place where we can meet the sunken, hidden and rejected aspects of ourselves. They are essentially our emotional wounds, the negative stories we’ve been told, the dysfunctional patterns we repeat in our lives. But these are also the places where we can heal the most. The sad, hurting parts of you are simply the places within you that you’re not acknowledging or honoring. Acknowledgement is the first step toward healing. We can infuse the dark with the light of our compassion and awareness, thereby creating an opportunity for things to change.

2) Seek someone to help you go on your journey inward

Find someone that you connect with, that helps you to feel empowered. Read books that inspire you on the topics you’re struggling to explore. Get whatever help you need, and assemble your support network. Some books you might want to check out are The Places that Scare You by Pema Chodron and Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach.

3) Accept how you feel

We create so much of our own pain by neglecting our feelings. If you feel anxious or angry, you may not want to look at it. You may shove it away; you may become resentful; you may get even more upset with yourself for having negative feelings. All of that is a recipe for harder days ahead. If you sit down and say to yourself, “What is it that I need? What am I feeling? How can I support myself?” then you’ve made a massive internal shift. We often don’t provide ourselves the space, safety and self-compassion to experience our feelings. Accept how you feel, and watch how everything improves.

4) Accept your life

Here’s the even harder part. This is a key aspect of mindfulness training. Instead of labeling the experiences of your life as “good” or “bad” and allowing what’s happening to dictate how you feel, you instead practice allowing life to happen without so much judgment. This is an art, but its payoff is a much more harmonious existence. When you dive into your winter and harder times, you can accept that winter is just a natural and important tide of life.

As you allow yourself to enter your winters, you will come to find that they will eventually lead you into the light, beauty and rebirth of a new season of spring.

...

Interested in working with Cailin?

Schedule a Free Consultation

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You Are Not Your Diagnosis

11/13/2017

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The Journey of Becoming

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

“Not a perfect soul, I am perfecting. Not a human being, I am a human becoming.”
-Normandi Ellis

So, let’s be real here. Our health dictates our lives.

When you’re feeling well, you can participate in life, follow your ambitions, you name it. When you’re not feeling well, it can become a struggle to live the life you want to live. And if you're not feeling well, you probably have some kind of diagnosis that is to blame... anxiety, depression, fatigue, hypothyroidism, IBS, heart disease, fibromyalgia, degenerative disk disease, arthritis... the list goes on and on and on.

...

But think about this: you are not your diagnosis.

I believe this is a very important concept to consider when you’re on any kind of healing journey. As the quote above describes, we are in a process of becoming. You weren’t who you were last year. You aren’t who you will become. And this, of course, also pertains to your health.

So why can a diagnosis become a problem?
Let's look at how the journey from well to unwell often unfolds:

...

Sometimes a diagnosis is straightforward, like a herniated lumbar disk. Sometimes it’s complicated and difficult to treat, like endometriosis. Sometimes it’s beyond the physical level, like PTSD.

Each of these diagnoses has a certain set of symptoms and diagnostic criteria; each has a specified treatment protocol; and each has a projected treatment outcome. Some diagnoses are relatively easy to treat, but many are not with conventional medicine. Why? Because everyone is different! The cause and effect process that creates disease and symptoms is an intricate web, and it can be challenging to sort out specifics and find answers.

What are your diagnoses? How do they make you feel about yourself?

...

Receiving a diagnosis can often feel like this:

1) Diagnoses can feel depressing. Your life has become limited in some way. Your relationships may be impacted. Your future may begin to look different. The treatments available may be limited or risky.

2) Diagnoses can feel overwhelming. You develop countless questions and some will never have answers. You undergo extensive tests and/or have to take a number of pharmaceuticals. It is hard to understand what is happening and how to “fix” it.

3) Diagnoses can feel disempowering. “How did this happen? How can I help myself?” We can wind up feeling like a victim of our physiology or life experiences that co-created our disease/illness/symptomatology.

And this is just to name a few.
But I approach any diagnosis in a different way...

...

The 3 Principles to Remember:
Why You Are Not Your Diagnosis

Principle #1: Everything is in a constant state of change. Cellar, interpersonal, experiential. You as a human being are not static. You are constantly evolving on every level, including your diagnosed symptoms.

Principle #2: There is no singular pathway to healing. The road is up and down and winding, full of unexpected turns. As you embark on a healing journey, you learn that there is much more to you than your diagnosis and that there are many avenues to explore to help you heal.

Principle #3: Healing is not one-size-fits-all. We all have differences in our physiology and psychology that influence how we respond physically, mentally and emotionally. (Standard treatments for diagnoses generally don't take these differences into account, and thus, you may not feel better.) If you learn what makes you unique, you will discover that you are much more complex than any diagnosis... and that within those complexities lies your innate ability to heal.

...

So, remember...
Your being is constantly adapting and evolving. Whatever your diagnosis may be, it is what is happening at this current moment in time. And if you are in a constant state of change, a state that is influenced by just about everything, then the argument is that you are not your diagnosis. Who you are now is not who you were a year ago, and thus, it is not who you will be in a year.

Be your own source of hope on your healing journey.
You are not a victim of your physiology.
You are not your diagnosis.

You are an ever-changing being on an ever-changing path of becoming.
Keep going. Keep searching for answers.

In time you will find that hidden within your symptoms and struggles are the very answers you seek.

...

Interested in working with Cailin?
Your first consultation is free.

Schedule a Consultation

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The Truth about Why I'm Here (for you)

“What brought you to this medicine?”

There is no reason I should be alive right now.
I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

learn about Cailin's treatment of Anxiety, Depression, Grief + Past Trauma

How to Climb Out of Depression

...
other articles you may like...

Cupping as an Exorcism

Releasing Held Traumas

Emotional Imprints

Past Hurt, Be Gone!

Entering Your Winter

Embracing the Dark

We all have seasons of our lives. We all experience ups and downs.

...

What does it mean to be in your winter?

...

How to Embrace Your Winter

...

When You Willingly Enter the Dark

As you allow yourself to enter your winters, you will come to find that they will eventually lead you into the light, beauty and rebirth of a new season of spring.

...

Interested in working with Cailin?

You Are Not Your Diagnosis

The Journey of Becoming

“Not a perfect soul, I am perfecting. Not a human being, I am a human becoming.”
-Normandi Ellis

...

...

...

...

...

...

Interested in working with Cailin?
Your first consultation is free.

Author

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Categories

The Truth about Why I'm Here (for you)

“What brought you to this medicine?”

There is no reason I should be alive right now.​I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

learn about Cailin's treatment of Anxiety, Depression, Grief + Past Trauma

How to Climb Out of Depression

...other articles you may like...

Cupping as an Exorcism

Releasing Held Traumas

Emotional Imprints

​Past Hurt, Be Gone!

Entering Your Winter

Embracing the Dark

We all have seasons of our lives. We all experience ups and downs.

...

What does it mean to be in your winter?

...

How to Embrace Your Winter

...

When You Willingly Enter the Dark

As you allow yourself to enter your winters, you will come to find that they will eventually lead you into the light, beauty and rebirth of a new season of spring.

...

Interested in working with ﻿Cailin﻿?

You Are Not Your Diagnosis

The Journey of Becoming

“Not a perfect soul, I am perfecting. Not a human being, I am a human becoming.” -Normandi Ellis

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Interested in working with Cailin?Your first consultation is free.

Author

Archives

Categories

There is no reason I should be alive right now.
I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

...
other articles you may like...

Past Hurt, Be Gone!

Interested in working with Cailin?

“Not a perfect soul, I am perfecting. Not a human being, I am a human becoming.”
-Normandi Ellis

...

...

...

...

...

...

Interested in working with Cailin?
Your first consultation is free.