Category: Eating Disorders

The Truth about Why I'm Here (for you)

7/15/2019

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

“What brought you to this medicine?”

Patients ask me this. I give my usual answer of “I wasn’t well; nothing else was helping me, and I finally decided to try it.”

That’s not it, though. There is the truth, the backstory you likely wouldn’t believe.
...

There is no reason I should be alive right now.
I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

I was at a funeral a couple of weeks ago. My aunt said to me, “I get your newsletter. I share it with my friend. Her daughter is really struggling with depression and anxiety. I wish she could come see you. I tell them that you really get it, that if anyone does, it’s you.”

It hit me. You’re right; I really, really get it. There are big parts of my “story” that I don’t share but that are the actual driving force behind why I’m in this field, why I’ve chosen (more like have been called) to do what I do. (It all comes full circle.)

I’ve been compelled to write my story recently. Here’s a snippet that might speak to you. It’s about the most pivotal (aka worst) time in my life at the young age of 13. It was the light shining through after the storm, an epiphany, when I realized that I was here (and more importantly knew how) to help people free themselves from their suffering, despair and emotional chaos.

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“When I left the hospital a week later, I reflected on the 6 months of my personal hell that led me to that fateful night. I said this, about that whole experience, as we left the parking lot: ‘No one could have helped me. No one knew what to do. But I know now. And I know that I can help people out of this. I know the way.’

There is zero doubt in my mind that I was saved. It’s inarguable. I didn’t ask for it. I didn’t want it at the time. But the epiphany I had when I left the hospital is the same way I feel now, 22 years later.

I know the way out.
I've envisioned myself as carrying a torch that never burns out, and I’m in the twists and turns of dark caverns lighting the way through. In the past, it was just me down there, trying to make sense of things, trying to understand my own darkness, trying to save myself, knowing there was so much more than what I could see at the time, knowing that there was a far more powerful light somewhere that I had to find.

I found it.
Now I see myself as back in those caverns, and they’re familiar, but they’re not exactly mine. They’re yours. They’re part of me, I believe, because we’re all connected, all one. But they’re yours in that they’re for you to navigate. They’re for you to find the light in. So I walk with you with my torch that never goes out. I don’t have your answers, but I’ve traversed similar land. I’m more of a guide, a facilitator, letting you know you’ll find your way out. And you will, you do.

I’m here for a reason, just like you.”

about cailin

learn about Cailin's treatment of Anxiety, Depression, Grief + Past Trauma

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Negative Self-Talk is the Real Disease

11/27/2018

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The effects of picking yourself apart

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

"Disease" refers to a harmful condition or process that interferes with normal functioning- physically, emotionally, mentally.
...

I spent too much of my early life belittling, berating and diminishing myself in my thoughts, behaviors and choices. It took a significant toll on my health.

Over the past decade or more, I have worked diligently to reverse that pattern.

And I have.
...

How do you talk to yourself?
How do you feel about yourself?
What are the stories you’re telling about yourself, your value, your abilities?
Who do you believe yourself to be?
What do you believe you can and cannot do?

The Cruel Voice
I think we all have an aspect of our minds that is callous, cruel or unsympathetic. It argues for our limitations, our weaknesses, our failures. It affirms our fears and picks us apart until we’re nothing but a pile of rejected fragments, totally severed from the truth of who we are and our innate worth.
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I believe kindness and compassion toward ourselves is the basis of healing and having the life we want most.

The Inherent Beliefs
We often aren't aware of how cruel our beliefs about ourselves are... nor how much they are limiting us or creating misery in our lives. If you're stuck in negative self-talk, you certainly won't be guiding your life in the best direction. You won't feel your best, either.

In order to dismantle negative self-talk, you need to dig up and throw out the inherent, underlying beliefs you hold about yourself that are generating your negative thinking.

Furthermore, your body is listening to your thoughts. So, what beliefs do you hold about yourself and how is this impacting your health? I can assure you that if you don't give a shit about yourself, your body will suffer.
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I believe that self-neglect, both physically and emotionally, breeds disease.

The Overcoming
Earlier in life, before I knew better, I believed this voice. It sent me down some dark roads.

Here's one example:
Before I was even 10 years old, I was critiquing my body constantly. I’d stare in the mirror and pick myself apart. In a few years, I was virtually devoid of love or concern for myself. Self-disgust and feelings of unworthiness fueled an eating disorder that nearly killed me. I survived quite triumphantly, finding a spark of love for myself that was there all along. The first thing I said while recovering in my early teens was this:
I knew the way out of that hell… and I wanted to show people that were suffering the way.

This was decades ago. I absolutely love my body now. My belly is happy, not flat. My thighs are strong, not disgusting. My stature is petite, not insignificant. And nothing about my worth stems from my body. In fact, my body has become my best friend because it always lets me know how I’m feeling and what I need. I treasure it and give thanks to it every single day.
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So, if you aren’t already, I’d recommend you start being gentle and kind toward yourself.
Talk to the sad and rejected aspects of yourself. Treat your suffering like you would if you were tending to someone you deeply love. Until you start forging that kind of relationship with yourself, your suffering will continue. Why?

Because it will only be you who saves you.
...

about cailin

Healing Food Cravings

11/3/2017

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7 Essential Steps to Ending the Food Craving Cycle

by Cailin O'Hara, MAcOM, LAc, Dipl OM

I had pizza and ice cream this weekend... in the same day. I had a craving for a few days, so I went for it. And you know what? It was fun, and the world didn't end.

Believe me when I say that I not only understand the roller coaster of food cravings, but I've also learned the way through and off of that wild ride.

...

Cravings are often a signal that we are in need of nourishment. If you struggle with food cravings, chances are you feel frustrated and defeated when you give in and eat foods that you think you shouldn't. Maybe it happens when you're in high-stress situations or when you get home from work and want to unwind. Maybe the cravings come on at night when you're feeling lonely or bored. Whenever or however it happens, the pattern is the same: the cravings strike, you feel out of control, and you wind up eating foods you label as "bad."

Here's the thing- cravings aren't to be feared or hated. You are not out of control. Cravings are actually an important signal from your body that it needs help. It's not getting the nutrients it needs. On a deeper level, you aren't getting what you need. You might be feeling out of balance, overworked and over-stressed. You may be neglecting your health or your emotional needs. Whatever the case, your body and your being are pleading for your attention. So, how do you answer your body's cravings without overeating and going down the spiral of feeling ashamed and getting upset with yourself for "failing?"

It's easier than you think. But it absolutely must start with you genuinely being interested in your well-being. You have to begin by approaching yourself and your cravings with kindness and patience. The more upset you get with yourself for eating a bag of chips or a handful of cookies, the more likely you are to perpetuate the cycle of cravings -> over-eating -> guilt -> cravings.

(Be sure to read this article if you think you may have a problem with food or your body image: Disordered Eating or Eating Disorder: What's the Difference?
And seek help from a licensed mental health provider if you or someone you know has signs of an eating disorder.)

Here's my top 7 list of simple, effective ways to help you end the cycle of food cravings and cultivate a healthier relationship with yourself...

7 Steps for Healing Food Cravings

Enlist the support of your friends, family or partner in tackling this list. Even better, do it together. And remember that acupuncture and Chinese medicine are powerful tools to help harmonize your system, improve digestion and reduce food cravings, too. Weekly treatments will make a big difference.

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1) Remind yourself that you are OK

This is the most important step! Don't demonize yourself for eating foods you crave. Don't make your life harder by being hard on yourself. Your cravings will likely only get louder if you belittle yourself. Negative self-talk (like "I can't believe I just ate that. I'm such a failure. I'm so fat") is actually a form of self-abuse... and it can be very damaging. Stop neglecting yourself and your needs. Instead, try approaching yourself with curiosity, patience and gentleness.

To help balance food cravings, start by developing a healthier relationship with yourself and get to know your needs. Ask yourself these questions:

What am I craving in my life?
How am I feeling today?
What am I thinking about when I'm eating?
What needs do I have that I am not meeting for myself?
What are the negative things I tell myself when I give in to my cravings?
What makes me feel satisfied in life?
What is something that brings me joy that I can do every day?

...

2) Include vegetables or fruits with every meal

This is an ideal way of reversing food cravings. Cravings often involve a lack of nutrients in our diet. Fruits and vegetables are loaded with vitamins and minerals that our bodies need, and most of us don't include them with each meal. As you give your body more of what it needs every day with this simple step, not only will you notice your cravings lessen, but you will have more energy and mental clarity, too.

There are several easy, inexpensive ways to include fruits and veggies with every meal. For example, bring carrots or apples with you when you're on the go. Steam frozen veggies, and serve them with olive oil, salt and pepper. Bake hearty veggies like sweet potatoes, and eat them throughout the week for a snack.

Daily Greens Drink

1 scoop Amazing Grass Superfood
1 scoop protein powder (vanilla or chocolate)
1-2 cups nut milk, rice milk or water
1/2 avocado or 1 tbsp olive oil
1 banana
Dash of cinnamon (optional)

Blend all ingredients and enjoy!

...

3) Gradually reduce processed foods

Cereal, crackers, granola bars, pretzels...they're a tasty, easy and seemingly nutritious ways to feed our hunger in our busy lives. Unfortunately, processed foods can be difficult for our bodies to digest, and they lack the rich nutrition of whole foods like fruits, vegetables, meats, whole grains and nuts.

Don't stress out over this and immediately eliminate all processed foods from your diet, though! I'm a believer in moderation and step-by-step progress. Consider the processed foods you eat, and replace one serving each day with a whole food (aka food that doesn't come prepared, in a package and/or contain extra ingredients). Examples of whole foods include nuts and seeds, fruits, vegetables, meat, rice, quinoa and oats.

Healing Rice Porridge Recipe (aka Congee):

2/3 cup uncooked white rice
8 cups filtered water

Add all ingredients into a saucepan and bring to a boil. Reduce to a low simmer and cook uncovered for 1 hour. Be sure to set a timer and stir the porridge every 8-10 minutes. After 1 hour, porridge will be thick and creamy. Ladle one cup of porridge into a bowl and add your favorite fruits, vegetables and proteins.
Examples:
Savory: steamed broccoli, 1 tsp of sesame oil, dash of soy sauce, pepper
Sweet: diced apple, 1 tsp of butter or coconut oil, 1 tsp honey, cinnamon

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4) Satisfy your cravings with the highest quality option

Yes, it's ok to satisfy your cravings! The key is to make sure you choose the highest quality foods you can. Not only do packaged and heavily processed foods have very little nutritional quality, but they often contain additional ingredients that can be chemically addictive! So, when you eat these foods you may wind up craving them even more.

When a strong craving sets in and won't quit, start with step #1. And then head over to your local natural grocery store. Scope out their baked goods or chip isle or whatever it is you're craving. Choose items with short ingredient lists of foods you know and can pronounce. Choose organic when possible. You can even buy whole food ingredients and make something yourself. Eating a piece of pie made from fresh whole foods or choosing a high quality dark chocolate bar can actually help satisfy your cravings and thus, reduce future cravings.

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5) Cultivate self-awareness

Self-reflection and self-awareness are essential when we're working on healing some aspect of ourselves. If we tune into ourselves, ask what we want and need, listen to our feelings, and generally just practice being a support system for ourselves, we come into greater overall harmony. And since cravings are a form of internal disharmony, connecting with ourselves is an important part of the process.

Every single day, set aside at least 10 minutes to practice cultivating self-awareness. You can try journaling, guided meditations or stretching your body to help facilitate the mind-body connection. Choose what speaks to you and helps you feel connected to yourself.

Journaling Method

Give yourself an extra 10 minutes in your morning or evening routine for this journaling exercise. Commit to doing this for 3 weeks every single day. Buy a notebook specifically for the purpose of journaling, even if it's just the plain, $1.00 kind. When you're ready to begin, be sure you will not be disturbed (this may mean you have to journal in the bathroom or your car, but that's ok!). Set a timer for 10 minutes, pick up your pen, and start writing. Do not stop writing for the entire duration, even if you don't know what to say. The goal is to write the very first thing that comes to mind, even if it makes no sense, and keep writing until the timer is up. Be sure to write without judgment. Have the intention of connecting with yourself and allowing your thoughts and feelings to flow.

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6) Move your body

Whatever capacity you have to engage your body, do it. This could be simple stretching every morning when you get up and every evening before bed. It could be attending a fitness class or working out with a free video on youtube. It doesn't have to be fancy, complicated or even difficult. There is one goal, and that is to connect with your body and get things moving. When you intentionally encourage flow in your body, it helps your whole being to harmonize. So, even your smallest efforts have an impact. Commit to moving every single day for 20 minutes. This can be 5 minutes four times a day. It can be an hour-long workout session at the gym. It doesn't matter. Just commit to moving in your body, however you can, every single day. You may be shocked how things change after a week or two of daily movement.

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7) Be patient with yourself

It is easy to feel overwhelmed when we start making changes in our lives. This is where patience comes in. While it may not come naturally to you, make the commitment to be patient with yourself. This means that through your ups and downs, you practice being patient with the process. You tell yourself positive things like, "I'm doing the best I can. Change takes time, and I'm committed to changing." Most importantly, every single second is a new moment for you. Don't waste your time and energy feeling terrible because you gave into a craving two minutes ago. You aren't who you were two minutes ago. Keep going, keep following these steps, and do it with as much patience and kindness toward yourself that you can muster.

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This list comes from recommendations and guidance I offer in my practice, but my patients also come in weekly or monthly to discuss their progress and receive treatments. Seek out the support you need as you work through these steps.

Do you need guidance around nutrition and understanding your needs?
Your first consultation is free.

Schedule a free consult

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The Truth about Why I'm Here (for you)

“What brought you to this medicine?”

There is no reason I should be alive right now.
I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

learn about Cailin's treatment of Anxiety, Depression, Grief + Past Trauma

Negative Self-Talk is the Real Disease

The effects of picking yourself apart

"Disease" refers to a harmful condition or process that interferes with normal functioning- physically, emotionally, mentally.
...

Other articles you may like...

Healing Food Cravings

7 Essential Steps to Ending the Food Craving Cycle

...

Here's my top 7 list of simple, effective ways to help you end the cycle of food cravings and cultivate a healthier relationship with yourself...

7 Steps for Healing Food Cravings

...

1) Remind yourself that you are OK

...

2) Include vegetables or fruits with every meal

1 scoop Amazing Grass Superfood
1 scoop protein powder (vanilla or chocolate)
1-2 cups nut milk, rice milk or water
1/2 avocado or 1 tbsp olive oil
1 banana
Dash of cinnamon (optional)

Blend all ingredients and enjoy!

...

3) Gradually reduce processed foods

...

4) Satisfy your cravings with the highest quality option

...

5) Cultivate self-awareness

...

6) Move your body

...

7) Be patient with yourself

...

Do you need guidance around nutrition and understanding your needs?
Your first consultation is free.

Author

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Categories

The Truth about Why I'm Here (for you)

“What brought you to this medicine?”

There is no reason I should be alive right now.​I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

learn about Cailin's treatment of Anxiety, Depression, Grief + Past Trauma

Negative Self-Talk is the Real Disease

The effects of picking yourself apart

"Disease" refers to a harmful condition or process that interferes with normal functioning- physically, emotionally, mentally.​...

Other articles you may like...

Healing Food Cravings

7 Essential Steps to Ending the Food Craving Cycle

...

Here's my top 7 list of simple, effective ways to help you end the cycle of food cravings and cultivate a healthier relationship with yourself...

7 Steps for Healing Food Cravings

...

1) Remind yourself that you are OK

...

​2) Include vegetables or fruits with every meal

​1 scoop Amazing Grass Superfood 1 scoop protein powder (vanilla or chocolate)1-2 cups nut milk, rice milk or water1/2 avocado or 1 tbsp olive oil1 bananaDash of cinnamon (optional)Blend all ingredients and enjoy!

...

3) Gradually reduce processed foods

...

4) Satisfy your cravings with the highest quality option

...

5) Cultivate self-awareness

...

6) Move your body

...

7) Be patient with yourself

...

Do you need guidance around nutrition and understanding your needs? ​Your first consultation is free.

Author

Archives

Categories

There is no reason I should be alive right now.
I should have died on the morning of January 8, 1998.

"Disease" refers to a harmful condition or process that interferes with normal functioning- physically, emotionally, mentally.
...

2) Include vegetables or fruits with every meal

1 scoop Amazing Grass Superfood
1 scoop protein powder (vanilla or chocolate)
1-2 cups nut milk, rice milk or water
1/2 avocado or 1 tbsp olive oil
1 banana
Dash of cinnamon (optional)

Blend all ingredients and enjoy!

Do you need guidance around nutrition and understanding your needs?
Your first consultation is free.